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Pruning fruit trees is very important. It allows the sun to reach all areas of the tree so that the fruit will be better and the tree will live longer I was determined not to call someone to do this for me, so I armed myself with a ladder and my best sewing scissors. I succeeded in opening the ladder and pinching my thumb in about 30 minutes. Then I climbed up this thing and had an idea of what Jack felt like when he climbed the beanstalk.

When I reached the first limb, I realized I knew nothing about pruning fruit trees but I figured it couldn't be that hard. After attempting to cut one of the smaller limbs from my tree, it dawned upon me that scissors weren't going to get the job done. So I borrowed my husband's chain saw.

It had to be better than my scissors, right? The problem was, I didn't know it would be so loud and it startled me. I tossed it on the ground. Lucky for me the grass is soft, because I topped off the ladder afterwards. I swore at the stupid chain saw, then we back up the ladder with it. I was prepared this time; I started again.

Once again, I tried cutting that smaller limb. Did you know that chain saws are very sharp? I accidentally took out six limbs and went halfway through another one. Oh man, this really ticked me off. My precious tree! 1/4th of it was on the ground. Never mind the fact that I now had a big scratch on my forehead after one of the falling limbs struck me there. But I wasn't about to give up.

How hard can pruning fruit trees possibly be? Getting the hedge shears, I climbed up in the tree this time. As I was going up, I kicked over the ladder by accident.

I was absolutely fuming as I waited until my husband found me in that bleeping fruit tree. I was bleeding from the head and had dirt all over my butt. As my husband was laughing and I was walking back to the house, I gave that tree a look that would wither it and muttered, "Until Next Year!"